Found the song Umbrella by Rihanna very irritating. So here's my commentary...
DISCLAIMER: I've got nothing against Rihanna or JayZ or their fans. Besides this post ain't all that funny or degrading.
Ahuh ahuh (yea Rihanna)S: yeah come on girl....
Ahuh ahuh (good girl gone bad)
S: oh yeah, you got me there.
Ahuh ahuh (take three... action)
S: nooooo....Cut !!...once more
Ahuh ahuh
S: any problem macho?? because you've been saying only that all along
No clouds in my storms
S: we dont call it a storm in that case,duh !!
Let it rain, I hydroplane into fame (Rihanna: eh eh)
S: wat?? dude, do you even know what a hydroplane means ???
Come'n down with the dow jones
S: or that ??
When the clouds come we gone
S: Is that english at all ? Oh, damn it. Should have paid more attention to Nishaan's lesson
We rocafella (Rihanna: eh eh)
S: Didn't get that either.
She fly higher than weather
S: how high is your 'weather' exactly ??
And she rocks it better
S: hmmm, maybe i know ;)
You know me
S: hmmm, maybe i don't !! :(
An anticipation for precipitation, stacks chips for the rainy day (Rihanna: eh eh)
S: Huh! Using big words, fella ?!?!
Jay, rain man is back with lil ms.sunshine
S: CAUTION: Calling yourself rain man can be considered gay. Especially when with lil ms.sunshine
Rihanna where you at?
S: Seriously girl, where you at ? Come on and sing, this guys killing me !!
[Verse 1]
You had my heart, and we'll never be world apart
S: Two completely different line, merged into one ?!
Maybe in magazines, but you'll still be my star
S: whatever !!
Baby cause in the dark, you can't see shiny cars
S: Heck! That was one 'eye-opener' !!
And that's when you need me there
S: Why, what you gonna do ?? Its already dark!!........Oh!! naughty, naughty !
With you I'll always share
S: Ok. Iam good.
Because
[Chorus]
When the sun shine
S: ahan....
We'll shine together
S: SHINE !!!
Told you I'll be here forever
S: No,No. I want you out of here by morning !!
Said I'll always be your friend
S: just a friend ?! :(
Took an oath imma stick it out 'till the end
S: Oh, I see.
Now that it's raining more than ever
S: Is it ?
Know that we still have each other
S: Naah. It isn't raining 'more than ever' !!
You can stand under my umbrella
S: We are under my roof goddamn it !! I don't need an 'umberella' .
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
S: Hello ambulance. Rihanna here has got the fits.
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
S: Hurry up goddamn it. She looks very serious.
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
S: Oh God. She's gonna die !!!
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh)
S: Noooooooooooo !!!
[Verse 2]
These fancy things, will never come in between
S: Oh! you're still alive !!
You're part of my entity, here for infinity
S: Yeah ?! I like your en'tity' though ! For infinity ?? Sweet !!
When the war has took it's part
S: What war ?
When the world has dealt it's cards
S: No, silly girl. Not everyone on earth knows how to play cards.
If the hand is hard, together we'll mend your heart
S: I don't know about the hand, but something else is hard. *grin*
[Bridge]
You can run into my arms
S: Aaaahhh !! *alarmed*
It's okay don't be alarmed
S: O....kay.
So go on and let the rain pour
S: Hey, I didn't call myself rain man. Jay Z did !!
I'll be all you need and more
S: Hope so !!
Because..
[Chorus]
When the sun shine
S: Yeah ! Yeah !
We'll shine together
S: Ok fine
Told you I'll be here forever
S: Oh come on, get done with it already will you ??
Said I'll always be your friend
S: Oh, God. Not again !!
Took an oath imma stick it out 'till the end
S: You wanna play tough ??
Now that it's raining more than ever
S: Is she dumb or something !!
Know that we still have each other
S: Fine. I give up.
You can stand under my umbrella
S: OH NO !! NOT AGAIN !!
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
S: AAAAHHHHH!!!
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
S: AAAAAHHHHH!!!
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
S: AAAAAHHHHH!!!
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh)
S: AAAAAHHHHH!!!
It's raining (raining)
S: Finally.
Ooo baby it's raining
S: It still is ??
Baby come into me
S: What do you mean ?
Come into me
S: No, seriously. I didn't get it.
It's raining (raining)
Ooo baby it's raining
S: Yeah Yeah. Blah Blah. All that crap. But what did you say before.
You can always come into me
S: What ?
Come into me...
S: Oh no no, silly .... I am using condoms.
